How to change your oil – or not

by HappyMechanic on March 29, 2012

HOW TO CHANGE YOUR OIL
Women:
Pull up to Desert Car Care when the mileage reaches 3000 since the last oil change.
Drink a cup of coffee.
45 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.

Men:
Go to an auto parts store and write a check for 40 dollars for oil, filter, oil lift (AKA kitty litter), hand cleaner and scented tree.
Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it back to the store to recycle, dump in hole in back yard.
Open a beer and drink it.

Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
Find jack stands under kid’s pedal car.
In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
Place drain pan under engine.
Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
Give up and use crescent wrench.
Unscrew drain plug.
Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil; get hot oil on you in process.
Clean up.
Have another beer while oil is draining.
Look for oil filter wrench.
Give up; poke oil filter with Phillips screwdriver and twist it off.
Beer.
Buddy shows up; finish case with him. Finish oil change tomorrow.
Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
Throw oil lift (AKA kitty litter) on oil spilled during step 18.
Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
Walk to 7-11; buy beer.
Install new oil filter making sure to apply thin coat of clean oil to gasket first.
Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
Remember drain plug from step 11.
Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
Hurry to replace drain plug before the whole quart of fresh oil drains onto floor.
Slip with wrench and bang knuckles on frame.
Bang head on floor board in reaction.
Begin cussing fit.
Throw wrench.
Cuss for additional 10 minutes because wrench hit Miss December(1992) in the left boob.
Clean up; apply Band-Aid to knuckle.
Beer.
Beer.
Dump in additional 4 quarts of oil.
Beer.
Lower car from jack stands.
Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.
Move car back to apply more oil lift (AKA kitty litter) to fresh oil spilled during step 23.
Drive car.

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My vehicle cheated on me

by HappyMechanic on March 9, 2012

Our relationships with our vehicles are extremely profound. We live in them . We have emotional diatribe in them. We store food and snacks in them. We may even…keep a few coins here and there for an emergency “I left my purse\wallet at home” episode.

The fact is …this is our domicile away from domicile on wheels.
Until……….We allow someone else to borrow our cherished chariot. We all have our reasons of why “we let such and such” take privilege behind the steering wheel of our road warrior sanctuary. In all reality, we just wanted to assist a friend or family member in dire need…..So we thought.

I have experienced many a story about a vehicle that required an inspection or diagnosis that was “no fault of mine”. ” I lent my vehicle out” explanation.
Its when a vehicle is given a thorough automotive inspection, where the surprises start to inch out one by one..startling the owner, and quite frankly the mechanics that perform the evaluation.

When we indicate the vehicle requires an alignment, due to some off road activity that has recently occurred ( fresh mud markings), you state ” Impossible”, I work in the city and never frequent offroad trails. We think, of course under our breathe, your vehicle cheated on you.

When we explain that the brake rotors have hot spots throughout from excessive heat, and several recent “panic ” brake stops, you declare “Impossible”, I recently repaired the Brakes (BTW recent is not 3 years ago, and is typically acknowledged as less than 6 months..just sayin), and I have never experienced any brake pulsation or grinding or even a squeek”. We think, of course under our breathe, your vehicle cheated on you.

When we express your vehicle inspection concern\s regarding a slight coolant leak originating from the lower radiator hose that should be addressed before the Arizona hot summers approach, you state ” Now that’s really impossible, as my neighbor just replaced that hose ,recently” ( At this point we must set a baseline of your definition of recently). Again, we think, of course under our breathe, your vehicle cheated on you.

Realizing that it is extremely difficult to keep track of everything that we keep with in life, and all of the monotonous details that come with, the 2 things you must avoid are 1. Neighbors working on your vehicle ( …well, may be not. Neighbors that work at the local grocery store during the day, may just get your vehicle in tip top shape. Besides their intention is well taken, even if duck tape happens to be a valuable tool at times)
2. You must know your vehicle, the trips it endures, the various driving habits it endures, and more importantly…..You MUST OWN THAT RELATIONSHIP WITH THE ONE MECHANIC THAT knows you, and your vehicles history…Be honest and upfront about your vehicle escapades, even if it feels like ,……..” She Cheated” on you…….Happy Motoring.

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Vehicle service and Gourmet Gilbert mechanics

March 8, 2012

On a beautiful day like today with a bit of chill in the air , while preparing for today’s schedule of vehicles lined up for service, we have started a ritual of planning our daily lunch. Well, lunch.. seems to be a bit simple. Its more like a gourmet shin ding . Now we truly [...]

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What About Green Cars?

December 30, 2011

Purchasing a green car means that people will have some extra concerns, but they will also have some extra advantages. People will need to weigh the pros and the cons before they decide to purchase a green car, but as long as they maintain their vehicles, they will receive the benefits for several years to [...]

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Understanding the Right to Repair Act

December 10, 2011

Support for the Motor Vehicle Owners’ Right to Repair Act from the Engine Repower Council may help give the legislation the impetus it needs to become law. The measure already enjoys broad support among motorists because it puts them – not the auto manufacturers – in charge of who performs maintenance and repairs on their [...]

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Social networking for cars?

December 2, 2011

Technology advances at such a rate it’s hard to keep up. Just think of how the internet has changed the way we live, work, shop and play. Now it looks as if it may also change the way we drive.  V2V (Vehicle to Vehicle) technology, based on networking could see a change in the way [...]

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What you need to do before buying a pre-owned car

October 11, 2011

Take a look at this Audi, looks pretty sweet doesn’t she? Unfortunately looks can be deceiving as the new owners of this car found to their cost This vehicle , which was not inspected prior to service, came in for an engine oil leak inspection. It was soon discovered that foul play was at hand….there [...]

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Knowledge is Power

September 30, 2011

Fun evening for women to learn a little and enjoy a lot! Desert Car Care is proud to announce a fun filled free seminar on the 12th November 2011 aimed at busy women who may feel a little intimidated by the vehicle service experience. “We know many women may feel intimidated about vehicle maintenance and, [...]

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Meet the owner

September 4, 2011

Meet the owner This is Frank, the driving force behind Desert Car Care. Frank spends time in both shops, sometimes dropping in to Gilbert or spending time serving customers at Chandler. His passion for his business is evident as is his joy in life. Spend time with Frank and you’ll always leave with a smail [...]

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